August 15, 2011

Guess what?

Matthew is about to start law school.
WOA! What? Where did that come from, right?  Warn us first before you spring this kind of stuff on us, Jenni!  (Just playing.  I mean, not about the law school thing, but about your unlikely reaction to it).
No, but really.  Almost a year ago, he decided it was something he really wanted to do, for a number of reasons.  So he studied day and night for the LSATS, took them, did great, got into a school (details of which I won’t be relaying here on the interwebs), and now he’s about to start.
I haven’t written about this on the ole blog yet.  I’m not really sure why.  Maybe I’ve been hoping he might change his mind about it. 
But now, as his first day looms, it’s starting to sink in that our reality is about to become quite different.  For the first year and a half of our marriage, he and I have spent nearly every waking moment together, as we’ve both been working from home.  Which may sound awesome, but it’s really not as awesome as you think, after a while.  Separation is good, and even VITAL in a relationship.  Too much togetherness breeds secret, murderous contempt.  (kidding.)
But as the impending rigors of law school approach, I can’t help but feel some anxiety.  Law school is supposed to be tough on relationships, though I’d like to think that we are stronger than your average bears.  Neither of us are needy, and I think I could definitely find plenty to do with all my extra alone time.  Such as gobbling up books like I’ve never done before, writing as much as possible, studying photography and editing, starting up my little business, and of course, supporting my man in every way possible.
I also know that I can be a selfish biotch sometimes fairly regularly.  I’m worried about how I’ll start to feel when Matthew’s head is buried in books every waking moment, and ::gasp:: he doesn’t have time to watch the Harry Potters with me or take my outfit pictures or go somewhere so it can appear we have a life… (for my blog).  Will I remain gracious and understanding and good-wifely, or will I throw PMS-induced tantrums and cry and wail of the injustices of my unfortunate situation?
I know, I know, I’m being a tad dramatic.  But I know things will be different now.  We’ll be pinching pennies like no other for one thing, and time together will be precious.
But you know what?  As much as I am anxious, I’m also excited.  I’m so proud of my husband for following his heart and being courageous enough to make this big change, even though the decision wasn’t always a popular one.  And I’m even excited about all the extra time this will give ME, to pursue some of my own dreams.  I can’t help but feel that we’re right on the edge of something great, though maybe getting there will take a few years of sacrifice.
And just because, here’s a picture of us from my mom’s birthday dinner on Thursday, complete with happy, smiling faces.  We’ll see how long they last…  (ha ha)
Mom's bday '11 067
And of course, if there are any law school/med school wives out there with some helpful advice for us, I’d love to hear it! 
Have a nice Monday!!
jennisig

97 comments:

  1. Wow, what a fun new adventure for the two of you!! I have zero good advice for you except hang in there!! It'll be over before you know it!

    And I know I say this on every post but holy crap you two are gorgeoussss.

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  2. Wade didn't go to law/med school, but I had a teeny tiny taste of it when he was in grad school, and sometimes it was frustrating! But it helped to keep myself busy, just like you said... you will do great! :)

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  3. Bravo Matthew! It takes a lot of guts to go through with your dreams. Often I like to just keep them out there in dreamland so I don't actually have to attempt them.

    I think you both will do great. I'm sure there'll be times of stress, that's probably what makes you most nervous! Not knowing when it will hit! But when it does you'll overcome. Maybe with a tantrum, maybe not. I won't judge! :) I give my own tantrums... weekly.

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  4. Love you two sooo much. We are pulling for you, praying for you, KNOWING you'll get through it... and be all the better because of it... So so proud of you both.

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  5. Wow this is so amazing! Good luck to Matthew! I can't imagine how I would feel, but I have a feeling it would be the same as you! Wondering if I would suddenly turn needy and emotional that I wasn't getting enough attention! - Alyssa

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  6. Congrats!! This is exciting news and I am sure a little scary all at the same time..

    Such a cute picture of the two of you!

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  7. I understand some of your anxiety. I've been in grad school, but I work part-time, so I've been able to get my school work done while the hubby is at work, so we still have evenings and weekends together. Now HE'S starting school, too, AND working full-time. There goes the evenings of useless TV... whatever shall we do? haha! You'll make it though! :)

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  8. Congrats to Matthew! This is great news. It's so awesome that he's following his dreams!

    Jenni, you two will be fine! I just know it; I'm psychic like that. lol Seriously, I think you two will adjust well. Definitely some sacrafices will be made but I'm sure it will prove to be worth it in the end!

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  9. This is really awesome, congratulations! And congratulations to your husband! I had my eye set on law school pretty much my entire undergrad career, and I did pretty well on the LSAT, but reality sunk in and I realized that it just wasn't for me.

    My husband is getting his PhD right now though, and I'm not going to lie: it can be tough. It can also be heartbreaking too, watching him pull all-nighters and get frustrated with professors and classmates. But it's 100% worth it, especially when I think about how he is following his dreams, and how our sacrifice now (little money, no babies for a while...) will ensure that we are set for the rest of our lives. So good luck for the next three years!

    Oh, and if you're interested, I follow a blog specifically for wives of graduate students: http://thegraduatewife.com/

    xoxo,
    Joelle

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  10. from the thumbnail version of this post, the title made me think you were announcing a pregnancy. but then i realized your hand was on HIS tummy and then i was extra confused. this is why you don't judge a post by its title. congrats, matthew!

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  11. I am sure that you will be fine through the law school adventure. Acknowledging that things are changing is the best thing that you can do. I just graduated law school and my future hubby and I made it through it being 200 miles apart. From the student perspective, just be understanding when he needs to study, read, outline, etc. This is where Chris was so wonderful to me. No matter how badly he wanted to talk to me, if I needed to study, he didn't guilt me to talk to him or make the 200 mile trip to see him. Law school is a great experience and it is awesome that your hubs has decided to embark on the adventure. Best wishes!

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  12. Congratulations to you both! Law school can be stressful but it is awesome that you are supporting his dream. Wish you guys the best =)

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  13. As someone who has been through law school with a relationship (that actually BEGAN during my first year) it is easier done than some would think. My bf was such a wonderful outlet from school, stress, etc. He was my balance- super important to have in school and to stay healthy!

    Congrats to your husband and just know that the 3 years will FLY BY- before you know it you'll be posting a graduation picture:)

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  14. CONGRATS to your hubby!! that is AMAZING! :-D

    you two seem to have such a strong, loving relationship and I know you'll make it through all the long studying hours!

    but you know what? I think you guys need to have a movie date and watch Legally Blonde. And then maybe some episodes of Law and Order!

    heheh!

    xoxoxo

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  15. Wow! How utterly exciting this will be for you guys. I feel you on the anxiety though. Any BIG change, and if you're me, sometimes little ones too, can be nerve wracking. The good thing is the time will go by so so fast and soon he'll be graduating and you'll wonder how it all happened so fast. My husband just accepted a new job last week, after working from home for the last two years while we've been married. SO...although there were times when he/we longed to get out of house and do something, I think we're both a little apprehensive about how it will feel once he has a full on, out-of-the-house, can't be there whenever I need him, J-O-B! But, cheers to new beginnings!!!

    http://bywayofney.blogspot.com

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  16. Well I am speaking from Matthew's point...I went back to law school after being married for a little over a year. I only have 2 semesters left and we're still very happily married...WOO HOO! I also worked FULL TIME while going to school at night. So basically during our first 4 years of marriage, I was at work/school Mon-Thur from 8am-9pm. It's definitely a sacrifice, but as long as you practice good communication and don't bottle up emotions, you'll be fine:) We had some rough times, but they could have been avoided if I had been open about what was really bothering me in the first place and what it was that I needed from the hubby. Also, pick a night every week for a date night, and stick with it! It was always nice to have something to look forward to after a long arduous week. Y'all will do great and it will be so worth it in the end!

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  17. what an amazing opportunity for Matthew! Congrats!!
    Well I am not married (yet) so I wouldn't know of any advice to give you on that department, but all I know is that you 2 are going to be fine. He most likely won't turn into one of that guys who lives behind a book, and I am prety sure he'll also have time to take daily photos for you (:

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  18. How exciting for Matt and you both!

    This is where marriage gets fun and exciting. Because things change and look different and you get to see how good you are together as you work through something new and unfamiliar.

    I love that he's following his heart and passions and that you're cheering him on in the process. (o:

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  19. The hubby and I were married for a year and a half of school, and if we could make it, you will too dear! Oh, and if you ever want to watch Harry Potter together via skype or twitter, just drop me a line. I'd be more than happy to oblige! :-)

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  20. YOu two are so cute together. NO, I am not a med school or law school wife but my husbands job demands a lot of time so everything you expressed in your blog rings loud and clear with me. We met in college and spent almost all of our time together until we graduated and real life set in. It's been good though. YOu end up treasuring those precious moments you have together. You'll be great. And as always, your blog made me laugh!

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  21. good luck! just hang on and support him. it will be hard for a bit, but you'll do great!

    http://breatheandhush.blogspot.com/

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  22. Congratulations, I have been reading your blog for a little while now and am inspired by how both of you go after your dreams and follow your hearts!

    My man went to grad school, he now works full time plus runs his own business on the side. We used to spend every moment together too, won't lie it's much harder now but we try to schedule one date night a week,etc. Good luck and if you ever get bored or lonely feel free to email me as I'm a great listener and enjoy conversation. Many blessings!

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  23. Very exciting! It will be challenging but so worth it in the end I am sure!

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  24. My hubby is in his final year (of 4) for Pharmacy School, and it is HARD. Especially the first year. In our case, we had to move to a new town for his school, so while he was starting school we were in a new place, trying to make new friends, and I had a new job. Too much new.

    Definitely take up hobbies (I started a photography business), but also PLAN times together, even if it's just dinner a few times a week. Also, talk things out before they turn into a big deal, because there will be times you'll both get frustrated and resentful of the time commitment law school will take.

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  25. Well, my husband isn't in law/med school, but he is working on his PhD in Environmental and Molecular Toxicology. I think the key to being married to a grad student is just to be as understanding as possible. I definitely still have my "high maintenance" moments as I like to call them. I try to have those moments when he isn't at his busiest (i.e. during heavy lab time for him). And when he is really busy and stressed, I try to do everything I can to make life as easy as possible for him. Side note: my husband is just about to start a really busy time for his research so I basically won't see him until September.

    Good Luck! It is challenging (mostly the penny-pinching part), but worth it. And I don't think it is as hard as some people make it seem.

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  26. I'm planning on going to med school next year and I'm sure Sean, and I for sure, would love to know all we can about how we should go about. We know it's not going to be easy but it is definitely not impossible. And to take this journey together definitely sounds do much mire amazing than without our other half. I'll probably will be shooting YOU questions every once in a while ;)

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  27. Congratulations to Matthew! That's great! I'm an attorney here...been pracitcing for two years...so if he needs any advice or whatever about law school, let me know! I'm sure that he's brilliant and will do awesome! As for relationships---since I don't have one, I don't know. But if he meets any nice, single guys in his class.... ;)

    ~Tiffany
    http://tiffanyd22.blogspot.com

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  28. Congrats to him! I'm sure you will be an amazing wife and support for him. And I think you have such a good outlook on this! It is such a great time for you to pursue your interests such as your photography and writing. (which is great btw. i just crack up reading your old posts. so entertaining!) last year my b/f was in grad school and it was such an adjustment because school demanded so much of him. you just have to mentally prepare yourself that he will be so busy with that. and find some good tv shows to get sucked into while he is at class or studying!

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  29. The feelings you are going through are the exact feelings I'm feeling right now ;)
    Russ will be graduating from medical school in June, and then begins residency. The first year of school we were long distance, then I moved to PA to join him!

    Things will be tough at times, but you'll work through it. I sometimes have to remind myself not to be selfish with my thoughts but I know that he's doing what he loves, so that makes me happy and brings me back to earth. It's definitely hard when you hear about all the fun trips or things other couples do but over time that passes.

    you two will be fine - your love is strong enough to withstand any obstacle. But if you need to vent, I'm here...I completely understand what your feeling and going through!

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  30. Good for Matthew and congratulations to him!

    I can completely see where you're coming from though. It's not really the same thing at all, but for the past two years before we got married, Ian was getting his masters degree. Obviously we weren't married yet, or even living together, but I threw many a "PMS-induced tantrums" when he couldn't go out for drinks on a random weeknight, or go on several coffee dates a week, or just kick back and watch Seinfeld re-runs.

    It was hard, and there were times of frustration, but what an amazing accomplishment when it was all over! You'll be a fantastic support for him--lots of back rubs and coffee. :-) Not to mention you are so creative, I'm sure you will find lots to do!

    You can do it!

    Brenda

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  31. Congratulations to Matthew, and the best of luck with his studies. It takes a lot of guts to go back to any kind of full time education {I made that decision last year myself} but it will be worth it in the long term. And don't worry, you guys will come out of this even stronger than when you went in. It comes across from the blog that you two have a LOT of love for each other, so I don't think there'll be anything to worry about there!

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  32. go matthew go!!

    I'm so excited for you two. I'm not one to welcome change. It takes a lot of warming up for me. But once you get excited about it- then you know it's the right choice. I'm so proud of him too - for following his heart and you too - for supporting him. Because neither are easy things to do.

    oh and gorgeous photo of you two.

    xo

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  33. Congrats to Matthew!!! That's so exciting for him :) I have a few friends who are doing the law school thang, and I must say it seems like it's rough. But I've heard that once you get through the first year, things get exponentially easier. I've got my fingers crossed for him (and you!)!

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  34. I completely understand! I'm totally needy (not to mention I was pregnant, then had a newborn, then a teether) while my husband was working on his Master's program. He is a school junkie- if he wasn't working on assignements, he was working on research (because he's crazy like that) or making his own case studies. He was also working 10-12 hour days at work, helping me cook dinner and get the baby bathed, and then working on homework until the wee hours.
    It was HARD.
    But he has just earned his degree and is SO HAPPY that he went through 18 months of stress to get to where he is today! I'm much like you and always told him it wasn't fair for ME (even though HE was the one in school) because I had to deal with doing things without him :(
    I'm glad it's over...but now he's looking at PHD programs.
    Greeeeaaaat.
    Hang in there!! :)

    W.
    Sweet Serendipity

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  35. Hi Jenni! I used to be in med school (but left during my medical internship because I found it waay too stressful... but that's beside the point lol) and I know wives (and even moms) in their residency but still manage to stay committed to their partners. I think you and Matthew will pull through with the kind of attitude that you have. Good luck to your future attorney hubby! :-)

    Irene

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  36. Back when the hubs and I were just bf and gf, he went to law school right after college and the whole time we were dating long distance. It was hard but we made it work. There is quite a bit of balancing that has to take place but it can and will work out!

    Enjoy the simple things: the fact that you get to sleep in the same bed with him, you can kiss him in the morning before he leaves for school, stuff like that. Plan on date nights (even if they are simple and/or just at home).
    Even while my Mister was studying for the bar he enjoyed the simple things like just having clean laundry or non fast food to eat.
    I love that you are being so supportive and he will too!

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  37. Gracious good news! Anytime one is following a dream it bodes well. It will be great you will be able to document how you are feeling during this journey so when you are on the 'other side' you will be able to look at it all from a different perspective. Time will fly and soon this will be an achievement instead of a dream...

    Enjoy the ride and hugs~

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  38. Ah, m'dear. I am not a law-school wife, and I have no idea what it would feel like to be separated like that, but I know you two will both thrive. And, I am sure you'll take on this challenge with the same courage you have all the others in your life. Because if you're anything like me, you might be a bit scared. But don't be. This will soon just be a blip on the radar screen we call life. And finally, if you need me, I'm always here. (Seriously. Like ALWAYS. I need a life... eventually. ;)

    xo,
    J

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  39. Congrats to Matthew! My husband is in his 4th year of med school (FINALLY) and like you, I cherish my time alone to read, write, and learn about my camera... and fine, to sing along at the top of my lungs to Taylor Swift. Because of that, the med school experience wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it would be (I was very nervous). Honestly, the worst part for me was moving to a new city where he suddenly had 120 new friends and constant social and intellectual stimulation whereas I was jobless and school-less at the time and had precisely 0 friends. We were planning our wedding his first year, and I felt a little worthless when I was at home researching flowers while he was dissecting brains.:)

    But, it quickly became clear that I was SO important to him as a link to the outside world. I think a lot of his friends may even have been jealous that he had someone to talk to about something other than medicine.

    Anyway, excuse the longest comment ever, but I totally understand your nerves and think the important thing for you is to have your own life. And it's clear you do! Plus, from what I've heard from my friends in law school, the studying is pretty light throughout the semester until finals. (The med students here narrow their eyes at their law student counterparts who are going out every night!)

    Good luck! Can't wait to read more about your new adventure.

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  40. Congrats to your hubby! I am about to start my third year of law school next week, so I know the stresses it can bring! My best advice is for Matthew to treat it like a job, starting at 8 or 9 and going to 5 or 6, even if his classes dont fit that schedule. Take the extra time in between classes to do the reading, look back over it before classes, take notes. That way, you have the evenings (and weekends) more freed up. Finals are still rough, but depending on his study habits, can be much more manageable.

    Law school is hectic and stressful. But it really isn't so bad. Once he gets through that first semester, he will have his own understanding of the process and what he needs to do for it...I realized I could ease up a little bit, and it was better for me!

    In my third year now, I am taking a lighter class load, focus my time more on extracurriculars (Moot Court and Trial Team), and really only have those days where my husband and I dont see each other a lot during finals! (We've been married the whole time by the way!)

    It's not always easy on marriages, that's for sure. But if you are both understanding, and he works to put law school and its rigors during a set time and is diligent, it will be fine!

    That is so wonderful! Congrats again! And good luck to both of you :)

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  41. Congrats to your hubby for getting into law school and following his dreams. Sometimes it's so hard to leave the familiar and enter into the unknown, but the rewards are well worth it.

    I started grad school 1 year into our marriage and at first it sucked because the time I wanted to spend with him, I was studying or doing papers. But in a few months, we just got into a routine and it really wasn't that hard. Now 3 years later, we made it. Sometimes it's nice to get away- for both of you. Him, time to meet new people, and start a new career. You, to do the same as well, in a whole different way. The opportunities are endless.

    Good luck and enjoy!

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  42. My hubby is in grad school (getting an MBA), I work, he works and we have 2 kiddies. I'd say if we can do it, anyone can! It can be frustrating at times. The biggest pain is scheduling everything around his classes; sometimes we/he misses out on doing things. Best of luck!

    Also what does your hubby do now if you don't mind me asking?

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  43. So exciting!

    My husband isn't in med/law school but he's a sub officer in the Navy, in the middle of the intense training program they make you go through before you're qualified. One thing I've learned is that it is infinitely easier on him if he knows that I'm okay. If I pout because I miss him and he has to study AGAIN this weekend, it makes it harder for him to be productive. I just have to remind myself that he doesn't want to be gone either, so the more laid back I am, the better it is for both of us.

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  44. I feel as though I can relate to you in a serious way here. My husband just started a new job, and he has to work the night shift for a bit until he puts his time in. At the same time, I just started a 9-5 "big girl job" instead of my flexible waitressing gig, and we just got married a month ago tomorrow. Sometime it can go four days without seeing each other, because we are on opposite schedules, we just miss each other by about a half an hour or so.

    I'm not going to lie, it sucks, and I like you am not super dependent or anything, but I just want a little time with my guy, and I don't think it is too much to ask.

    That being said, my advice to you would be to make use of your time alone, I do things that he doesn't want to do, or just have 'me' time. Also, cherish your moments together even more, because the stress can make you both grumpy and you don't want to take it out on each other.

    Lastly, you had mentioned that you feel as though you are on the edge of something good and that this is a sacrifice, and I think that's a great way to view it. So if you get mad at each other, and want to just scream , just remember that it's one of those things you'll look back at as tough, but worth it.

    Sorry for the long comment!!

    Laura

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  45. were you on the bubble, yes no? love your writing style! xx

    amy @ easydoesus.com

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  46. you and your hub are adorable!

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  47. What a great and scary thing! Hopefully over time you'll both get into a new routine that will work and everything will be dandy.

    I have a friend who's hubby just started his ER residency and another who's hubby is in law school. This doesn't help you out at all but they're thriving..and popping kids out left and right, so there MUST be time spend together. haha

    Emily w/Amazing Grapes

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  48. Best thing you could do to be supportive would be a f/t job outside the home and save your blog and etsy business for gravy. Be an equal partner and watch your man's esteem for you multiply! This was our situ and now that we have it made as far as money goes, we can look back on those days with extreme fondness and both feel satisfied we did it as a team. Good Luck!

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  49. Aww congrats to your hubby, how exciting!! I'm sure the absence will only make your hearts grow fonder! <3

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  50. Oh my gosh are the best house wife ever! Congrats to Matthew!! I am sure he'll do great :) can't wait to hear your journey ahead!

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  51. Congratulations to Matthew! :) I can imagine what a tough decision that was for him to make!

    I am sure you will be a gracious and understanding law school wife, Jenni!

    Whenever I think of lawyers, Emily Giffin's books came to mind because in every single one of them (I think), one of the main characters either is a lawyer or married to one!

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  52. I am so excited for your new journey! This will definitely bring you two closer because You guys are awesome and I know you won't let it tear you apart.

    BEST advice I can give you, read closely.... Have a baby, RIGHT NOW! lol totally just kidding. :) Seriously though, take one day at a time and always enjoy the moments together and don't waste the time you are given with nagging and whining about the time you haven't seen him. He will need you more than ever. Sacrifice will be more than you know, but will be worth it in the end. I mean, Ryan is already a third year med student and it seems just like yesterday he was a first year. You guys will be out of this sooner than you can imagine.

    I always look at my journey as how much happier and stronger we are having to do this together than if we would have done it separate. You will have a better understanding and love for each other. Love you girl, and you know I am always here if you need anything! :)

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  53. Oh wow! Big changes!! But everything will work out! God has big plans for you, lady! I'm actually about to make a huge life/career change too, so being looking for major life change posts from me too! Praying for you during your transition. :)

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  54. That is awesome Jenni! I kind of know what you are going through because Andrew decided to go back to Grad school. It makes me cranky too because I know how cranky he can get when he's stressed for a test. It is for the best and I know you will be SO glad when he is a lawyer!

    Congrats to Matthew and all your accomplishments to come!

    Love you doll!

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  55. I think you will be JUST fiiiine! I think this will only help you grow closer and stronger as a couple. And seriously... if anything were to ever happen to you two I would cry because your love story is SO amazing.

    Ohhh and two of the most beautiful people I've ever seen (Soon meet!).

    I'm excited that you are looking at this as an opportunity for yourself as well! I think you'll be amazing in anything you pursue!

    Sabrina Says

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  56. First, Cute picture, you guys look adorabvle.

    Second, I know exactly what you are going through. After my Matthew finished college he decided to go to the police academy to become a police officer. I had known that he always wanted to be a cop, but I think it really hit home when he actually started training. Before I knew it, he was spending all of his time studying law codes and doing physical training. But I also found that almost instinctively I started helping and supporting him in any way that I could to make the process easier for him. I'm sure you will do the same, just remember, if you are feeling down about him studying all of the time, how do you think he feels, that always makes me get through it.

    xoxo
    Petchie
    www.itsallofthelittlethings.blogspot.com

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  57. That's pretty exciting news. I think it's so great that you're husband is going to law school, and starting a career he really wants to do. More power to him for that.
    But I understand that it'll be hard for you. Especially with being around him every day to not so much...But that'll just make the time you do spend together much more special.

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  58. your husband is kind of dream boat. you are such a beautiful couple!
    my boyfriend was pre-med for a long time before switching to air force officer route, and it has shown me that all things school involved with be time consuming. have a lot more flexibility in my schedule than he does and I'm still working on not being jealous of his "important" life. I would say the biggest thing is, to remember that you matter too! Seize your alone time

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  59. Well, first of all, congratulations to Matthew!! That is definitely a big move and something that I'm sure wasn't easy. Your worries and concerns are definitely understandable. I'm sure going into something that you know is going to be very different is tough in a marriage.

    I'm glad that you have things to look forward to for yourself while he's away at school or busy studying. At the same time, it'd also be great if you guys can plan something where maybe once a week you make a fun dinner together or go out for a date night. I'm sure that you will find something that works for the two of you :) It will be an exciting adventure!!

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  60. Though he would be busy with the law school, I know he will find time so you could spend moments together. I agree that constant togetherness sometimes becomes boring and a time away from each other brings life to a relationship - but of course not too long.

    You two look great on the picture (lovely couple). I know those smile will last a lifetime.

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  61. That's amazing news Jenni!!! Congratulations to your hubs. Going through the LSAT and all of those tough applications can suck the life out of you like a dementor with no patronus to defend you! haha! Sorry, I'm a geek. While I'm not a law/med student wife, my husband is in his last stages of getting his M.A from Columbia, so I can understand how tough it is. I would recommend at the very least setting 2 date nights per month and STICKING BY THEM. Getting out, away from the stacks of papers and books, can be panic inducing yet will help your relationship. Having something official on the books will not only be something for you to look forward to, but an assurance you guys are still getting much-needed time together.

    Good luck on this next amazing adventure!!!! Look at it as a challenge that will only make you two stronger. I did that when we had to endure a 2 year long distance relationship.... And we made it work.

    xoxo

    Noa

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  62. That is awesome! Good for him. And for you, for being a supportive wife. I'm sure you guys will do great. It is hard, yes (my husband has been in school since we got married 3 years ago), but totally doable. Sometimes you won't see each other much and obviously won't get as much down time together, but it honestly does make the time you get so much sweeter!
    Good luck to you both!

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  63. First off, congrats to Matthew! This is a big deal! Second, I can totally relate. When Troy is home a lot (which happens a lot when you have a husband who only works four months out of the year and is in school), we tend to argue more. I guess I should say I tend to pick fights more because he's in my territory :) You'll do great, he'll do great, and I'm sure you'll be able to do great things with your alone time. I've come to love being all by myself!

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  64. That's amazing news Jenni!!! Congratulations to your hubs. Going through the LSAT and all of those tough applications can suck the life out of you like a dementor with no patronus to defend you! haha! Sorry, I'm a geek. While I'm not a law/med student wife, my husband is in his last stages of getting his M.A from Columbia, so I can understand how tough it is. I would recommend at the very least setting 2 date nights per month and STICKING BY THEM. Getting out, away from the stacks of papers and books, can be panic inducing yet will help your relationship. Having something official on the books will not only be something for you to look forward to, but an assurance you guys are still getting much-needed time together.

    Good luck on this next amazing adventure!!!! Look at it as a challenge that will only make you two stronger. I did that when we had to endure a 2 year long distance relationship.... And we made it work.

    xoxo

    Noa

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  65. My hubbys getting his MBA right now, and working his normal career job, and doing the accelerate program through a great University. To say thats its 'easy' would be a lie. I just am glad we dont have kids yet, because I cannot imagine that. BUT it isnt AS hard as you think it will be. It will be a huge adjustment, but once you get used to it, you deal. The thing that weve done is to make sure that NO matter what, we have at least one date night a week. Even if that means its on a Wednesday because thats the only night he doesnt have to study. You make it work, and honestly you find the good in it. We now are so much more intentional with our time together, so instead of just watching TV and barely chatting on a normal night, we now go out and do something. Have much deeper convos, etc. Hopefully it flies by for you! Good luck! And just remember, its harder for him than it is for you. Be supportive, loving, encouraging, and not nagging {sometimes easier said than done!}

    <3,
    Adri
    Dream Book Design

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  66. My best friend is in her second year in Law school and she told me it's pretty hard, but I'm sure you will both take the challenge and make the most out of it! Good luck to both of you :) xo

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  67. WOW That is EXCITING! And stressful!! Just remember all the great things that you love about him if you two ever get in a fight! Tell him good luck!!!!! :)

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  68. First of all - what a gorgeous couple you two are!!
    Secondly, YAY! That is seriously so exciting! What an adventure for you both! The best of luck to you guys!

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  69. Way to go, Matthew! I know this will be a major change for you both, but I'm positive that you ARE stronger than the average bears. Love conquers!

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  70. Congrats to Matthew! What an exciting accomplishment (: And you will thrive, Jenni...I know it (: I'm excited to see your photography business grow. Do you have to move out of your area for school? I'll be praying the changes are all smooth!

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  71. WOW! How exciting for you guys!!! CONGRATS!

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  72. Law is definitely a good field to be in as America gets closer and closer to becoming a full out police state each year!

    Does he want to be a prosecutor or defender, or has he thought about those things yet? :D

    -Sidecarsally

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  73. yeah, you have to think of it in the way that's all "good for you both! pursuing your dreams on his part, and time for yourself". it'll be good, i promise. i know this is a completely different scenario, but when my boyfriend went away to boot camp last summer and i was stuck with all the alone time in the world, i thought it'd be the end of the world. boring and lame and all that. and of course, sometimes it was and i missed the hell out of him, but i found out more about myself and what i want to do with my life that summer than any other period of my life. take this time to just do your thing, girlfrannn. it'll be alright :)

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  74. Well, as a current grad student, I can definitely say that I wouldn't make it through a single quarter without Kyle bringing me dinner, reading my papers, and keeping me company during late night grading sessions. It takes a very special kind of spouse to be that support system and I know you'll be great!

    I'm excited to see what adventures you have, especially in the next few months as you work through this transition. :)

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  75. Congrats to your hubby! I agree, I think you are on the cusp of something great. Everything happens for a reason! You two are so cute together! Good luck to you both as you start this new chapter!

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  76. That is so great. I can see why you'd be a little nervous though too. Change is scary, but you guys will get through it and will appreciate the time you do get to spend together. Can't wait to hear all the adventures that are to come!

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  77. First congratulations to her hubby!!!! That is def. an accomplishment & second you are pretty freaking awesome for encouraging him to follow his heart, because that is exactly what he needs, SUPPORT!

    i have a very similar story as to what you just wrote, but opposite spots {& not married haha}. but i got in to PA school last fall {&started this past january} but i would be living 3 hours from my other half & i thought about ALL the things you just mentioned. but you know what im going to be honest, it is going to be hard, sad, frustrating, & alot of CHANGE. but you WILL learn to adapt to each other, it might not be easy at first, but it will get easier. i am almost done with my 2nd semester {friday to exact} & i can't even believe we made it this far, just because of all our doubt before we started {which is normal} -- but man does it feel good to also prove people &ourselfs wrong & be able to say WERE MAKING IT! :]

    i truly wish you the best of luck, but actually you won't need it! you will be just fine!!

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  78. I spent three years in law school and I don't think it will be as horrible as you fear. Law school is grueling and he'll probably forget that a television exists but he'll still take breaks. It's necessary for the grey mush up there.

    What I found most supportive is an interested husband. He was truly and honestly interested about the stuff I was learning, and that really helped because sometimes, that's all I could talk about.

    Good luck to you both!

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  79. It always surprises me at how much time apart from my husband makes me appreciate him more.

    You'll do just fine, good luck!

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  80. Congrats Matthew! This is going to be a big adventure for the two of you, but I'm sure everything will be okay :)
    My boyfriend is still studying at university but I am aswell, so we both have no money and time, haha :D Seriously: You get used to it after some time ;)

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  81. That is so awesome, Jenni! I've been waiting for an official post about this topic! Congratulations to Matthew for taking the leap and making the committment. I can certainly understand your anxiety about the academic demands and the type of pressure this can put on your quality time together, but girl, you've SO got this. Yes, it will be tough and yes, it will require patience and sacrifice from both of you, but I also see it as this amazing opportunity for BOTH of you to grow as individuals and as a couple. And I am super excited to see what new adventures lie in wait for you!

    And for what it's worth, I can be a selfish biotch sometimes and often throw PMS-induced tantrums and unleash psychotic, crying fits...and Phil isn't anywhere NEAR wanting to go to law school. 'Poor guy is always dodging my emotional grenades! But he's a trouper...and that's why I love him. :)

    It'll be alright and will all work out, friend. Carpe Diem!

    Much love!

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  82. Ohhh how exciting! I'm not a law school wife, but I am about to start my 3L year (next monday). Law school seriously makes you crazy and has been hard to the point of ending any and all romantic relationships I have had during it. When my last boyfriend and I broke up he told me maybe we would have survived had law school not put such a strain on our relationship. I know that this sounds negative but I really don't mean for it to be. I'm positive that you two will be fine!! Going into it knowing that it will probably be somewhat of a strain on your relationship is important (and keep this post flagged for around Thanksgiving time when he's going through his first set of Finals and totally hating life - and you probably will be too. You can look back and remember how you were feeling at the beginning). Just remember how much this means to him and to you and how amazing it will be when he is done! Cheers and good luck to both of you!

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  83. Congratulations to Matthew! One of my friends is starting law school in two weeks...the nerves sound familiar! Easier said than done, but try not to worry. You'll find a rhythm even in the chaos.

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  84. Congrats to your husband!

    My Hubs isn't in law school but there is a chance that he will be working on a project in another city in the near future(which will require him to spend week nights away from the house) and I'm a little worried that it will be harder on me than I think. I am used to spending week nights with him and I will miss that but I know this is a once in a life time chance for him to grow his business and I don't want to hold him back. I am trying to see the big picture and remember that it will only last a short time and then things will go back to normal!

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  85. How exciting! Good luck to your hubby!

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  86. Wow that is such exciting news! I know it's going to be hard (hopefully it won't be!) on y'alls relationship but just think how awesome it will be a few years from now. When you're done pinching pennies in a few years, maybe y'all could pinch some cutie-patootie baby cheeks that belong to y'all?! :p haha Just a suggestion!

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  87. yay that is so awesome Jenni, congrats to your hubby!!!

    i will say that when Sean was in graduate school i was a bit frustrated, haha. i couldn't wait for it to be over ... all his free time was in a book and he would complain all the time about school, lol. now i can laugh about it but i use to yell at him and tell him how this was his decision so spare me, haha.

    we are a lot better now! but we both ended up fine. we still love each other and we are both alive! :)

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  88. I'm not worried at all! You guys can get through it! If us military wives can get through our fiances/hubbys being gone for years, you can do it I just know it and he will do fantastic in school. I can't wait for you to start your business too!

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  89. Oh my gosh, Jenni, that is so exciting! Congrats to your husband for getting into a law school and going for it. (:

    Coming from the wife of a pilot... you'll enjoy the alone time, but at times you'll also not enjoy him being too busy or away from home. But I'm sure you and Matthew are on the edge of something great!

    Let me know if you read any good books with all of your free time. ;) I'm looking for suggestions.

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  90. Good Luck to your hubby!
    Mine is in his second year of med school, and, to tell you the truth- it's really not as bad as some people might scare you into thinking... Also, the time apart is well, really really nice. I even didn't work AND had our first baby during his first year, and it went great. I got lonely at times, but I couldn't find a job. I got to work on all sorts of hobbies and read a lot! Our saving grace has been that when my hub comes home from school, he's HOME. Unless he has a big test the next day or something, he leaves school at school as much as he can. Also, make friends with the other wives/girlfriends- friends who are in the same boat are a lifesaver!

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  91. SO surprised! ;) It'll be a change for sure, but think about how supportive he'll be of you following your dreams in the future (a little opportunism never hurts if it makes it easier)

    PS gorgeous photo

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  92. Congrats! When my husband started medical school last year I thought for sure I'd never see him again, but it turns out it makes those days you do get to spend together all the more precious. It's quality not quantity, right?

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  93. Congrats to your hubby on Law School!! Thats so great! It will be very rewarding when he is done and I am sure you guys will get through it together! I have faith!

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  94. Finally! I have experience in this area! Ok, so I dated someone who was in law school and even through him taking the bar exam. I'm not going to lie. There are times when he will be so busy studying or reading that you'll think you'll never have time together but eventually there's light at the end of the tunnel. You just have to make the time and remember that it doesn't last for forever.

    Congrats to him though! Law school is a major accomplishment.

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  95. Congrats to your husband! I went to law school and forced my husband (boyfriend at the time) to suffer through it with me. It was definitely rough at points, but isn't everything in life? Law school gets easier as it goes along, so I'd say just focus on making it through the first year and then it's all downhill. The whole "work hard, play hard" mantra is a good one, so I recommend making set times for school and set times for fun. It'll help make sure that you're both fully present in whatever you're doing, even when stressed! Lastly, the month leading up to finals and during finals may be extra rough - so you should plan a fun girls' weekend or two for yourself and leave your husband to his misery :)

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  96. Hi, Jenni! I saw your most recent post about your 2011 moments and I reread the post about Matthew's law school endeavors. I thought I should share my story.

    I'm not married, but I've been with my boyfriend for seven years now and he's gearing up for pharmacy school. We're both 22, and he's been knocking out those pesky prerequisites when he decided to embark on a journey towards pharmacy school in 2008. It's 2011 (almost 2012!) now, and we're looking at an expected start date of Fall 2013, but damn it's been rough. I've seen him endure sleepless nights, heartbreaking frustrations, test cramming, breakdowns, etc.

    I didn't initially realize that amount of time and energy that was required of him, so there were times of conflict between us; but I slowly started to realize my role in this and it's just as important as his. I had to be the biggest supporter and the one to cheer him on constantly. I had to be understanding and make my own sacrifices. I had to endure my own times of distress because of all of this, but we both know that it will be very worth it in the end.

    It may be harder now or it may get harder once he begins pharmacy school. Regardless, the best advice I can offer is that YOU have to be willing to face all of the challenges in the next ___ years and have a "bring it on" attitude. It's not something that all couples can stomach or tackle well, but if you're going to do it, build up your strengths and fight it together and conquer it.

    I believe you will both be fine. Maintain your understanding and love, give him space when he needs it for academic reasons, and keep it engrained in your mind that YOU are the one who can take him away from everything when he asks you to. And do it well. (= Good luck to you and Matthew!

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  97. @Jehnel, I just wanted to let you know how very much your comment meant to me. Excellent, excellent advice. Best of luck to the both of YOU, as well!

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